Okay, I knew I had seen this a few weeks ago, so I wasn’t imagining it. On the website of (Anon.) Literary Agency are some agent profiles. This one jumped out at me:
(Female) joined (BlahBlahBlah) Literary Agency in (year). A former editor at (wherever and wherever), she began her career at (So&So) after earning an MFA…at (well-known NYC university). She represents (basically crime an suspense books) and is looking for (x, y, and z ) and unpredictable violence. (emphasis added) E-mail her at blankity-blank.
If you want her real email, please contact me so that you can threaten her with kidnaping and torture. It’ll be her best query of the month, guaranteed! I’m sure she will respond that day!
OK I’M KIDDING! DON’T EMAIL HER!!